Have you ever gotten yourself into something and then immediately started negotiating with the Heavenly Father? Oh, we can become master negotiators when circumstances get uncomfortable. “Lord, if You get me out of this one, I promise I’m going to do better.” “Father, fix this and I’ll never do that again.” “Lord, open this door.” “Lord, close that door.” Matter of fact, “Lord, take the whole door off the hinges because I am ready to go.” We laugh, but if we are honest, sometimes our prayers can boil down to four words: Get me out of this.

Now, there is nothing wrong with asking the Heavenly Father for help. Lord Jesus actually tells us in Matthew 7:7 (NIV), “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” We are supposed to pray. We are supposed to bring our needs, desires, fears, hopes, and concerns before the Heavenly Father. But recently, while I was in prayer, the Holy Spirit began ministering something to me that forced me to look deeper than simply what I was asking for. The question became: Do we trust the Heavenly Father, or do we want Him to perform?

The Holy Spirit brought me to Lord Jesus hanging on the cross between two criminals. Luke 23:39–43 (NIV) records two completely different responses to the same Jesus, in the same place, during the same suffering. One of the criminals looked at Lord Jesus and essentially said, “If You really are the Messiah, save Yourself and us.” In other words, If You really are who You say You are, prove it. Get us down from here. But the other criminal responded differently. He acknowledged that they were receiving the consequences of their own actions, recognized that Lord Jesus had done nothing wrong, and then said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” Lord Jesus responded, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

The more the Holy Spirit ministered that scene to me, the more I realized how easy it is for us to sound like the first thief without even noticing it. “Lord, if You really love me, fix this.” “If You really hear me, change this.” “If You are really with me, get me out of this situation.” “If You really have power, show me.” Sometimes we can turn trust into a test. We may never say, “Perform for me,” but underneath some of our prayers, that may be exactly what we are asking.

And before I could apply any of this to somebody else, the Holy Spirit turned the mirror toward me. I began asking myself some uncomfortable questions. Am I selfish in some of the things I ask for? Am I looking for shortcuts? Do I want the Heavenly Father Himself, or have I become more interested in what His hand can give me? Do I trust Him because He is God, or does my trust depend upon Him doing what I want Him to do?

Those are not easy questions.

That morning during prayer, I normally would have followed the structure I usually use, but eventually I could not. The Holy Spirit was ministering to me so heavily that I just stopped. I remember sensing Lord Jesus almost as though I saw Him distantly—not distant in the sense that He was far away from me, but high, exalted, and yet somehow still near. I did not have anything clever to say. I did not have another request ready. I did not have words of my own that felt appropriate. I just sat there in my prayer closet in the presence of the Heavenly Father and allowed the Holy Spirit to minister to me.

Sometimes prayer is talking. Sometimes prayer is asking. Sometimes prayer is thanking. And sometimes the presence of God becomes so weighty that all you can do is sit there.

The Holy Spirit was helping me understand that asking the Heavenly Father is not the problem. Our motives matter. James 4:3 (NIV) warns that sometimes we ask and do not receive because we ask with wrong motives. That does not mean every unanswered prayer is the result of a bad motive. It means we should be willing to let the Heavenly Father examine why we are asking.

Are we asking because we trust Him?

Or are we asking because we want Him to perform?

Do we want His will, or do we simply want our situation changed?

Do we want His presence, or only His provision?

Do we want relationship with the Heavenly Father, or have we reduced prayer to a transaction where we ask and expect Him to deliver exactly what we ordered?

Then I thought about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in Daniel 3:17–18 (NIV). They were facing a fiery furnace because they refused to bow. They knew God had the power to deliver them. Daniel 3:17–18 shows their confidence: God was able to save them. But then came the words that reveal real trust: “But even if he does not…” they still would not bow.

Whew.

That is different.

Faith knows God can. Trust still calls Him God when He does not do it our way.

That does not mean we stop praying for deliverance. It does not mean we stop asking for healing. It does not mean we stop praying for the door to open, the situation to change, the provision to come, the relationship to be restored, or the burden to be removed. It means our relationship with the Heavenly Father cannot depend upon whether He performs according to our expectations.

And that brings me back to those two thieves.

One thief wanted Lord Jesus to get him off the cross.

The other wanted Lord Jesus to remember him.

One was focused on getting out of his present circumstances. The other recognized Who was beside him.

And here is what gets me: the second thief did not get down from the cross.

His circumstances did not suddenly become comfortable. His suffering did not immediately disappear. Lord Jesus did not prove Himself by removing the temporary situation the man was facing.

He gave him something greater.

Paradise.

The first thief wanted escape.

The second thief wanted the Savior.

And the one who trusted Lord Jesus received more than getting down.

That made me examine my own prayers differently. Because I do not want my relationship with the Heavenly Father to be built primarily around what I can get from His hand. I want the relationship. I want His presence. I want His will. I want to know Him. I want to trust His heart even when I cannot understand what His hand is doing.

Yesterday, in This Ain’t Ordinary, we talked about how the Heavenly Father made space for us. He made a world. Through Lord Jesus, He made a way. And Lord Jesus tells us that there is a place prepared for us.

So now the question becomes personal.

If the Heavenly Father has made all of that room for us to be near Him, do we actually want Him?

Or do we mainly want what He can do for us?

Yes, Father, I am still going to ask. I am still going to seek. I am still going to knock. I am still going to bring You my needs, my desires, my fears, my plans, and my hopes. But help me not to treat You like You have something to prove to me. Help me trust You when the answer is yes. Help me trust You when the answer is no. Help me trust You when the answer is wait. And help me trust You when I do not understand the answer at all.

Help me trust Your heart when I cannot trace Your hand.

Because sometimes the greatest answer is not getting us down from here.

Sometimes the greatest answer is knowing that wherever we are, Lord Jesus is there with us.

Next Step

Reflect on something you have been asking the Heavenly Father to change. Consider what your response would be if His answer, timing, or method looked different from what you expected. Ask yourself honestly whether you have been seeking His presence or mainly seeking a particular outcome.

Invite Lord Jesus to be your teacher in that area. Ask the Holy Spirit to examine your motives and help you trust the Heavenly Father’s heart, even when you cannot understand His hand.

Keep asking. Keep seeking. Keep knocking.

But above everything else, keep wanting Him.